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It never fails that when I talk to women with hair loss issues of any kind, the issue of men comes up-what do they think? Will he freak out if I tell him? Do wigs weird him out? Will he bail when he finds out?
Last week I talked to a sweet girl who asked me “What does your husband think?” This prompted me to ask him later that week what he did think. We have been married for 16 years and so I don’t really give tons of thought to what he does think about it-only that he loves me no matter what-with hair or without hair. Being the amazing guy he is, when I asked him about it (and how women in general are always wondering and potentially worrying) he responded “I could write a blog for you….?”. Awesome. Here it is.
Hair loss, in all its impersonal medical and vernacular forms, is a thief. Words like areata, diffused, thinning, and universalis dull the real damage hair loss does to women. Bald can certainly be beautiful, but unless you’re feeling empowered to be the ultimate feminist, you want hair. You may not want Repunzel- let me climb down this mountain using my own locks kind of hair- but most women want hair. There’s a reason Clairol and Nice-n- Easy make millions. Slogans like “only her hairdresser knows for sure”, tells a story of hair’s importance for women. Hair for women is like fuel to a fire-it makes you sizzle. Hair loss can rob women in the prime of their lives of that vitality. The truth is, women’s hair is also important to the men who love them. Though we might be shy about admitting it, we care about what our partner looks like. Seeing someone we love suffer at the hands of hair loss can be paralyzing. Not only does hair loss steal away your hair, but it can infiltrate our relationship-not because we stop loving you-but because you stop loving yourself. Hair loss steals your attention from your own beauty and can leave you devastatingly depressed and feeling less vibrant.
As a husband, hair loss started intruding soon after our first daughter was born. We now have three beautiful daughters and with each birth, Amber’s hair would become thinner. She tried everything, until she found a solution. When she started wearing lace hair systems, everything changed. We gained back all that we had lost at the hands of this disease. Sure, there was an initial mental adjustment. You know us, we get a little weird when you change your color, or go shorter: imagine coming home with a full head of hair for the first time. But once the initial –O.M.G. wears off, the transition is worth it. After a while, I couldn’t stop desiring her in a whole new way. What the thief had taken was back and helped her to connect with her true beauty. When she feels confident and sexy about herself, I’m more than willing to come along for that ride! When she feels this way, I only want to get closer. And no one gets as close to her as I do and I cannot tell-I forget that it’s not her hair-she just looks beautiful! She’s a beautiful woman with great hair! I feel energized by the confidence she projects because hair loss no longer robs her joy and energy.
Visit AmberC on The Network: http://community.womenshairlossproject.com/amberc/
Amber’s Website: http://www.personalhairtherapy.com
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